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Adulting 101

Such is Life: Lessons From the Death of My Auntie

Regardless of how much we grieve , the dead will be dead. they are not coming back. We: the living are the ones left .

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” I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith.”

These were the last words as we went around the grave singing the words of 2 Timothy 4:6-8. My heart was full. Guilty was the term. As I placed my flowers on her grave I was apologetic. My heart was honest. Entirely in my life, I have never felt as guilty before. My aunt was gone. No memorable moments, just what she left me: A Prayer Book

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Regardless of how much I regret and cry, Auntie is dead. What can I do? I can learn. Take notes and introspect. Learn (Ai definition) To acquire knowledge or skill in a subject, typically through study or experience. Let’s learn together, shall we?

Spend time with your loved ones. Be it your friend or relative, create time for them. Do not have a boundary that this is blood: even friends can be blood. Love is something no amount of money can purchase. Spend time together. Yes, we are chasing the bag but what is the essence of working for it without using it? I believe money can never be enough. Do not let grief unite you.

Love people regardless. People’s mistakes and shortcomings tend to create rifts between people. If you love somebody, it means you also embrace their shortcomings. We have to be in the capacity to tolerate and solve the problems. I’m not advocating for toxicity but if it is your cup of tea, walk away or seek help.

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Most importantly: how you feel after the loss of a loved one is what is the solution to it. Every business is a result of problems hence creating opportunities. That is the same case here; you control your life. Instead of feeling lowly, pray for strength and live from the lessons.

Rest in Peace Auntie…

Adulting 101

Boost Your Business: Essential Tools for Your Small Business

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With Kenyans trying to keep up with digital evolution, there isn’t a better time like right now to upgrade your business. Small business tools are crucial for managing and growing operations. These tools assist with project management, marketing and sales, financial management, communication, customer relationship management (CRM), human resources (HR), and e-commerce. We are in the technology revolution era after all.

Why Use Business Tools?

Improved Efficiency: Tools streamline processes and automate tasks, saving time and effort.
Greater Organization: They help track tasks, deadlines, and schedules, ensuring better time and resource management.
Enhanced Communication: Tools facilitate effective communication and collaboration with teams, clients, and stakeholders.
Increased Productivity: Streamlining processes and improving communication boosts productivity.
Better Decision-Making: Access to data and analytics aids in making informed business decisions.
Improved Customer Service: Managing customer interactions helps in providing better service and building strong client relationships.

Below are essential tools for your small business. Handpicked towards improving your business operations and allowing for scalability while efficiency looks to help you time manage.

  1. Project Management
  • Trello: Visual task management with boards, lists, and cards.
  • Asana: Advanced features for task assignments and project timelines.
  1. Marketing and Sales
  • Mailchimp: Email marketing platform for creating and tracking campaigns.
  • Hootsuite: Social media management for scheduling posts and analyzing performance.
  1. Financial Management
  • QuickBooks: Comprehensive accounting tool for invoicing, payroll, and financial reports.
  • Wave: Free invoicing, accounting, and receipt scanning, ideal for freelancers and startups.
  1. Communication and Collaboration
  • Slack: Real-time communication through channels and direct messages.
  • Zoom: High-quality video conferencing with screen sharing and recording.
  1. CRM Tools
  • HubSpot CRM: Free CRM for managing contacts, tracking leads, and automating emails.
  • Zoho CRM: Affordable CRM for managing sales, marketing, and customer support.
  1. HR Management
  • Gusto: All-in-one platform for payroll, benefits, and compliance.
  • BambooHR: Tools for applicant tracking, onboarding, and performance management.
  1. E-commerce
  • Shopify: Comprehensive platform for creating and managing online stores.
  • WooCommerce: WordPress plugin for transforming websites into e-commerce stores.

  • Notable Mentions
  • HubSpot CRM: Manages customer relationships with features like contact management and sales tracking.
  • Google Docs: Facilitates document collaboration and cloud storage.
  • Google Analytics: Tracks website performance, visitor behavior, and campaign effectiveness.
  • Slack: Enhances team communication with real-time messaging and integrations.
  • Calendly: Simplifies scheduling with customizable links for clients to book appointments.
  • Asana: Organizes tasks, tracks progress, and integrates with other tools for team collaboration.
  • Canva: Creates professional marketing materials with customizable templates.
  • WordPress: Builds and manages websites with customizable themes and SEO optimization.
  • Mailchimp: Manages email marketing with templates, automation, and analytics.
  • Hootsuite: Manages social media presence, schedules posts, and analyzes performance.
  • Google Ads: Runs targeted advertising campaigns with detailed analytics.
  • Moz: Improves SEO with tools for keyword research, link building, and local listing management.
  • Evernote: Enhances productivity with note-taking, task management, and collaboration features.
  • Google Drive: Offers cloud storage and file sharing with collaborative tools like Google Docs and Sheets.
  • Payroll Software: Manages payroll, tax compliance, and time tracking for employees.

Choosing the right business tool is essential for your small business to succeed. These tools enhance efficiency, organization, communication, and customer service. By leveraging the appropriate tools, small business owners can save time, boost productivity, and focus on growth. With Kenya still figuring out the digital landscape, this is the best time to integrate these tools into your business. Do more and reach more.

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Adulting 101

What To Do When You Find Out She’s Pregnant

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Finding out that your girlfriend, sneaky link or even one-time hook-up is pregnant can be a life-altering moment filled with a mix of emotions. Running through a range of emotions in one go from fear to uncertainty It’s crucial to handle the situation with care, sensitivity, and responsibility regardless of what type of relationship was shared. But remember, no matter how much fear or panic you are going through, she’s going through a lot worse. You’ve never needed to be an empath more than you do now.

First Interaction: How to React

1. Stay Calm
Your initial reaction is critical. It’s natural to feel a surge of emotions—shock, fear, confusion—but try to stay calm. Take a deep breath and compose yourself. She is likely feeling just as overwhelmed, if not a lot more, and will need your support. So that initial reaction grounds her as it grounds you. Remember, you are going to be okay.

2. Listen Actively
Give her the space to express her feelings and thoughts without interruption. Listen to her concerns, fears, and hopes. Show empathy and understanding, and avoid jumping to conclusions or making immediate decisions. Don’t ask whether she’s sure it’s yours, or whether she’s sure the test is positive. Just listen.

3. Acknowledge Her Feelings
Acknowledge her emotions and validate them. Phrases like “I understand this is unexpected” or “It’s okay to feel scared and unsure” can help her feel heard and supported. I mean you both knew the risk with unprotected sex, so denial is only foolish. Acknowledge your own emotions as well.

How Not to React

1. Avoid Blame
Do not blame her or yourself for the situation. Statements like “How could you let this happen?” are unproductive and can cause further stress and hurt. Because what do you mean? This is a both of you situation.

2. Don’t Dismiss Her Feelings
Avoid dismissing or minimizing her feelings by saying things like “It’s not a big deal” or “We’ll figure it out later.” Her feelings are valid and need to be respected. Listen and respond as calmly as you can master, with as much understanding.

3. Don’t Make Rash Decisions
Avoid making any immediate decisions about the future. This is a significant moment that requires thoughtful consideration and discussion.

What to Say

1. Express Support
Let her know that you are there for her. Say something like, “I’m here for you no matter what,” or “We’ll get through this together,” or “You’re going to be okay”

2. Discuss Next Steps Together
Encourage an open discussion about the next steps. Ask questions like, “What do you think we should do?” or “How are you feeling about this?” If you are unable to decide, get professional help, visit the hospital and counsellor with her. Two heads ARE better than one.

3. Reassure Her
Provide reassurance about your commitment to working through this together. For example, “We’ll explore all our options and make the best decision together.” Remember that this decision is hers, but help as much as you can.

What to Do

1. Take Time to Process
Both of you need time to process the news. Take a few days to let the initial shock settle before making any major decisions. Don’t make any panic rush decisions that could endanger her or you further; either emotionally or physically.

2. Educate Yourselves
Learn about your options. This might include speaking with a healthcare provider, counsellor, or trusted family members. Understanding the implications of each option—parenthood, adoption, or abortion—will help in making an informed decision.

3. Communicate Openly
Maintain open and honest communication. Regularly check in with each other to discuss feelings, concerns, and thoughts as you navigate this situation. You have to be with her through it, whether physically or not. Knowing she’s not alone goes a long way.

4. Seek Professional Guidance
Consider seeing a counsellor or a healthcare professional together. They can provide valuable information, support, and guidance during this challenging time.

5. Plan for the Future
Once you’ve discussed and decided on a course of action, start planning for the future. If you decide to continue with the pregnancy, discuss financial, logistical, and emotional preparations. If you choose another option, seek support to navigate that process as well.

An unplanned pregnancy can be a confusing experience, but how you handle the initial reaction can set the tone for how you both move forward. Stay calm, supportive, and open to discussion. You might initially disagree with what the next steps are, but together, you handle it better. Avoid blame and rash decisions and seek professional guidance to make informed choices together. Remember, this is a journey that requires both of you to work as a team, offering each other understanding and support every step of the way. Regardless of whether you move on as a family or not. Remember, you are both going to be okay, breathe.

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Adulting 101

Wataonaje? Its Okay to Move On, to Be Happier and for Them to See It

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In the aftermath of a fallen friendship or a breakup, the big question is: should you block them on social media? It’s a common impulse to want to erase all traces of someone who may have hurt you or with whom things didn’t end well. However, there’s a compelling argument for keeping that digital door slightly ajar, not enough to let them back in but just enough that if they look, they see. And to ask what Billnas and Rayvanny keep asking, ‘Wataonaje?’.

First, consider the aspect of visibility. By not blocking someone, you allow them a window into your world, one where you continue to grow and thrive without them. This isn’t about nurturing bitterness or showing off; rather, it’s about showcasing your resilience and happiness. When they see how well you’re doing post-breakup or after the friendship has ended, it might prompt some introspection on their part. Perhaps they’ll see what they lost and realize that the issues leading to the fallout were partly, or wholly, their responsibilities.

Allowing an ex-friend or partner to see how you flourish without them can act as a catalyst for personal growth on their part. Sometimes, seeing someone else doing well is a wake-up call that prompts us to reflect on our behaviour and potentially make amends or changes in our lives. If your continued visibility sparks a positive change in them, then keeping the social media lines unblocked serves a higher purpose.

Choosing not to block someone can also be a sign of emotional maturity. It shows that you are secure enough in your own healing process that you don’t need to erase someone’s existence to move forward. This approach can help you transition from any negative feelings towards a place of peace and neutrality. Furthermore, maintaining mutual connections on social media keeps things less awkward for friends or groups shared between you two.

Life is unpredictable, and feelings can evolve. By not blocking someone, you leave open the possibility of reconciliation in the future, should it ever feel appropriate. People grow and change, and the person who might have hurt you once could become a friend or a valuable connection down the road.

Ultimately, the decision to block someone should come down to what you need to heal and move on. However, if you are in a place where you can handle it, keeping them unblocked might just be beneficial. Living well and embracing your happiness without them not only serves as the best kind of personal victory but also stands as a silent testament to your strength and self-worth. Let them see how well you are doing and let that sight remind them of what they might need to change within themselves. Remember, you’re not responsible for their growth, but your own progress might just inspire theirs. So, don’t feel guilty for moving on and being happier—it’s your right and your journey.

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